The moment I clearly identify what I really should be doing, I lose all interest in doing it even though I might have been doing it (and enjoying it) unknowingly earlier. Suddenly there is no more motivation to follow through.
Is this rebelliousness? I'm not sure.
The element of fun seems to be in unraveling the mystery... and in the discovery of a truth and arriving at a moment of clarity... but not in using the insight and arriving at the desired 'goal'.
Goals seem to motivate for very short durations. Once I know what to do, I'd rather figure out what else to do!
Incidentally this pattern has been there for a long while. The staple work area gets implemented more with a sense of duty (even though there is enjoyment) than with genuine passion. Any 'above and beyond' or intermittent projects always fascinate and produce dramatic results due to higher focus and follow through.
The book with the most valuable insights is kept aside to be read later in-depth... and 'meanwhile let me mine all the insights from other books.' Sounds so silly, but its so real! What a strange personality trait!
1 comment:
omshanthi bro,
I think even I have been through such a feeling. may be what could be happening is that once the goal is clear as to what to do, somewhere we feel that we have already accomplished being so close and hence the mind switches over to other things, even though the task is not completed fully.
Mind has become so tamo that it keeps wandering that does nothing fully!!
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